For some reason, it's much easier for me to get my thoughts out here than in my journal. Therefore, I am afraid this blog has become my way of journaling.
It's such a strange thing to have such wonderful memories bring you so much pain. I know I have expressed this before, but it doesn't seem to be getting any easier. I have been allowing myself to remember things more clearly, which compels me to write them down. So many perfect moments...
The very first look he gave me as they held him over the drape. The way he would run his arm up around his head and down his face while he was nursing. The comments we got from the nurses about how adorable he was with his sandy blonde hair. His faker cry. The way he put the soles of his little feet together. How much he loved laying on the changing table and stare at his octupus. The way he would sleep on my chest, in his carrier, for hours at a time while I worked. How much he loved to watch and listen to Dad play guitar. The way he would "mmm" when we fed him. The way he would rock himself back and forth in his circus. The way he didn't cry when Libby or Lyle tried to lick his face right off. His curled up fists in the bath. His chubby legs standing on my tummy. His belly laugh when his Dad would rub his whiskers on his back. The way he looked in red. How he loved to sleep in bed with Mom and Dad. How is eyes wouldn't always shut completely when he was sleeping. How he loved his binki. How he loved to be sang to. How he would "drill" Dad, by trying to nurse on him. The way he would stop crying if you took him outside....
I just hope these moments stay as fresh in my mind as they are right now. I miss you Abram- so much more than I ever thought possible.
5 comments:
So sweet!
It's the little things that mean the most. Those are wonderful things to remember.
I am grateful I was able to see most of those things. I remember the love and enthusiam in his eyes and the joy he felt when he looked and mom and dad. Anyone who talked to him made him smile or even laugh out loud. However we relate, he is the creation of something good, loving and wholesome through two parents who recognized his specialness and provided him with surroundings that feed His special spirit.
Those are such precious memories, Jame. I miss Abe, too. :( I know we will miss him lots this weekend at Bear Lake because the last time we were there, he was with us. Thankfully we still have those wonderful memories of him to cherish. Love you guys xo
these memories that you've posted brought the biggest smile to my face. i love to have memories of abram. i remember the last time he was in the office i came over to your area to play with him. you were feeding him and I remember noticing how he was grabbing for your hand that was holding the spoon and just thinking about how big he was getting. i love you all and i love this page because it helps me feel connected to all three of you. thanks for sharing your memories with everyone.
love you!
maggs
Post a Comment